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I have resisted writing this column for seven years because it feels indulgent. Please know that it is not born of any ongoing strife or discord at my church.

But for any senior or associate pastors who are willing to claim this, I thought I would share a few things it might help you to know. Reading this, it could sound as though I dislike my ministry calling. You could not be more wrong.

If you think church survival is a big issue in our current era, perhaps you haven’t noticed the generational shortage of good ministerial candidates. Younger people are entering seminary with the intent to serve churches in alarmingly small numbers these days.  

About twenty years ago, this decline began to show up. That means the forty-year-old experienced pastor every church is looking for never entered the ministry in appreciable numbers way back then. The pipe is the emptiest it has been in the modern church era.

However, those of us who are out here serving are a finite resource. If cared for properly, we will carry out our sacred calling for an entire lifetime in some form. We’ll be there for you and at our best if you are also there for us. 

So, let me interrupt with a couple of disclaimers. Why write this? I saw a well-written article recently that was similar. It purported to tell church members the things their pastors are afraid to say aloud. If you ask or email me, I’ll send you a link to that one. This covers different topics.

I also write from the perspective of a pastor who has spent a career serving churches that fit most accurately within the Mainline Protestant tradition. A few dynamics might differ if you are in a Catholic, Episcopal or a more conservative, evangelical setting. 

We are most often full-time, meaning that this sacred calling is also a working career. We spent years in school beyond college earning master of divinity degrees. In my case, that also includes four years earning a legitimate doctorate from an accredited school, beginning at the age of forty. 

A good starting point might be to remind yourself that the Golden Rule is a good standard to keep in mind. In Matthew 7:12, Jesus reminded listeners that “Treat one another as you would like to be treated” is a good ethic. That includes your pastor. 

The sacred calling doesn’t supersede being humans. If you fail to let us know your loved one is ill or hospitalized, we can’t serve you. If you blame us for your own issues, we look bad. If you disappear without explanation it hurts. If you make up something that implicates us falsely, our reputation takes a hit. Who wants any of that?

We are awakened in the night far more than professional confidentiality will allow us to tell because someone has gone to the hospital or is dying. That is hard, but people in other professions have hard jobs, too. Serving in true emergencies is an honor. 

Those of us who do this for forty years or more will take our spouses along on a journey where all our vacation and social plans are supposed to only be written in pencil. Some church families might decide not to consider the commitments we’ve made, and may disregard our disappointment in breaking them. 

We are also texted and called at all hours with non-emergency matters. Each time, the church member thinks, “Well, this will only take a few minutes of his/her time.” What they miss in thinking that is two-fold: what if every active member takes only a few minutes of your off time on a regular basis? What if that quick matter actually triggers a larger issue that now has you mentally distracted and checked back into the office for hours afterward?

I met someone recently who asked, “So, are you full time?” I said, “Yes. Would you like to hear about yesterday’s eleven hour day or Monday’s twelve hour day?” We work far more than just Sunday mornings and Wednesday nights. 

Your pastor passionately and hopelessly loves what they do. Imagine if we really didn’t like our work? But your pastor has to be at their best for your congregation when it really matters. We are finite resources. If you replenish us, we are ready. If you burn us up? Well, I doubt you want anyone to do that to you.

DR. CHARLES QUALLS is senior pastor at Franklin Baptist Church. Contact him at 757-562-5135.